Slots

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You put the coin in the slot and pull the handle. What, you thought there was a trick to this?

Actually, there is a bit more to it. But first, some background. Old-timers will tell you slots were invented to give wives something to do while their husbands gambled. Slots used to be stuck at the edges of the casino and could be counted on one hand, maybe two. But now they are the casino. The casinos make more from slots than from craps, blackjack, and roulette combined. There are more than 140,000 slot machines (not including video poker) in the county. Some of these are at the airport, steps from you as you deplane. It's just a matter of time before the planes flying into Vegas feature slots that pop up as soon as you cross the state line.

Progressive slots are groups of linked machines (sometimes spread over several casinos) where the jackpot gets bigger every few moments (just as lottery jackpots build up). Bigger and better games keep showing up; for example, there's Anchor Gaming's much-imitated Wheel of Gold, wherein if you get the right symbol, you get to spin a roulette wheel, which guarantees you a win of a serious number of coins. Totem Pole is the Godzilla of slot machines, a behemoth that allows you to spin up to three reels at once (provided you put in the limit).

Other gimmick machines include the popular Wheel of Fortune machines, slots that have a gorilla attempting to climb the Empire State Building, heading up as you win, and machines with such themes as Elvis or the Three Stooges. And, of course, there are always those giant slot machines, gimmicky devices found in almost every casino. They may not win as often as regular slots (though there is no definite word on it one way or the other), but not only are they just plain fun to spin, they also often turn into audience-participation gambling, as watchers gather to cheer you on to victory.

Nickel slots, which for a long time had been overlooked, relegated to a lonely spot somewhere by a back wall because they were not as profitable for the casinos as quarter and dollar slots, are making a comeback. Many machines now offer a 45-nickel maximum (meaning a larger bet on those machines than on the five-quarter-maximum slots), and gamblers have been flocking to them. As a result, more cash is pocketed by the casino (which keeps a higher percentage of cash off of nickel slots than it does off of quarter slots), which is happy to accommodate this trend by offering up more and more nickel slots. (See how this all works? Are you paying attention?) Ultratightwads will be pleased by the increased presence of the humble penny slot, but few, if any, allow for only a penny bet -- in fact, the maximum bet is $3!

The biggest trend in Las Vegas, though, is the use of cashless machines. When gambling with these machines, players insert their money, they play, and when they cash out, they get -- instead of the comforting sound of coins cascading out into the tray -- a little paper ticket with their total winnings on it. (Those of us who find the sound of the coins pouring out a comfort are only slightly pleased to learn that the same noise plays, as a computer-generated audio effect, when the ticket is disgorged.) Hand in your ticket at a cashier's window (or use the omnipresent ATM-style redemption machines), and you get your winnings. It's not nearly as viscerally satisfying, but it is the wave of the future; most of the casinos are already entirely cashless, and the rest are on their way. Why take this cheap thrill from us? Because it saves gambling time (instead of waiting for the flow of coins to stop, you can grab your ticket and pop it into another machine) and maintenance time (keeping the machines stocked with coins), and the casinos no longer need worry about having enough quarters on hand. We are not pleased about this. Note: As a result of cashless machine trend, the casinos are much quieter, as many of the formerly chatty machines have been largely silenced, and that famous Vegas clang-clang is somewhat dimmed.

Are there surefire ways to win on a slot machine? No. But you can lose more slowly. The slot machines use minicomputers known as random number generators (RNGs) to determine the winning combinations on a machine; depending on how many numbers have been programmed into the RNG, some machines are "looser" than others. A bank of empty slots probably (but not certainly) means the machines are tight. Go find a line where lots of people are sitting around with trays full of money. (Of course, yours will be the one that doesn't hit.) A good rule of thumb is that if your slot doesn't hit something in four or five pulls, leave it and go find another. It's not as though you won't have some choice in the matter. Also, each casino has a bank of slots that they advertise as more loose or with a bigger payback. Try these. It's what they want you to do, but what the heck.

Note: Many slot machines no longer accept coins at all for bets. For these new machines, bets have to start with bills accepted into special slots. This will make all but extinct the famous change carts that used to roam the floors, helping people get rolls of quarters and the like.