WEEKEND ESCAPE
New theme park rides pass muster again! And again!
A connoisseur, 6, gives the thumbs-up to attractions at Carlsbad's Legoland and SeaWorld in San Diego. Chaperons, bring stamina.
There's danger lurking at amusement parks.
The danger is a word.
And that word is "again."
As in, "Uncle Craig, Shipwreck Rapids got us soooo wet. Can we ride it again?"
Or, "Uncle Craig, Bionicle Blaster made me so dizzy, I think I'm going to throw up. Let's go again!"
Or, simply, "Coastersaurus! Again, again, again!"
Coastersaurus, for those who haven't heard, is a roller coaster at Legoland. Two weeks ago I rode it. Again and again and again.
I rode many coasters, in fact. My mission was to rate the newest rides and attractions at Legoland in Carlsbad and SeaWorld in San Diego. Tough work.
Enter Daniel, age 6. He's more than a nephew. He's a coaster connoisseur, a maestro of amusement. This is a kid who, at 3, was doling out critiques of Knott's Berry Farm and chiding the park's mascot, Snoopy, for not being attentive enough. In the world of critics, he is no Gene Shalit.
For our outing two weeks ago, the kid rated rides using the system of Mrs. Matzner, his first-grade teacher. If a ride earned a 4, that meant it was "very good," he said. A grade of 3 meant "pretty good," 2 meant "OK" and 1 meant trouble.
Coming along for the ride were Daniel's 2-year-old brother, Eric, a protégé in the making, and my partner, Todd.
One Saturday morning we were among the first to pass through Legoland's turnstiles, beelining for the park's new marquee ride, the Coastersaurus.
Daniel looked up at the twisting track. He glanced at Uncle Todd, who's a tad roller-coaster-phobic. Then he muttered to me, "He's going to be crying for his mommy."
Turns out the Coastersaurus — a junior coaster, in theme park parlance — wasn't so scary. Our little cart scooted around a life-sized brachiosaurus made of Lego bricks, never whizzing much faster than 20 mph. There was virtually no wait to get on, so by 10:15 we had ridden it twice.
"My face was like this!" Daniel exulted, pulling his cheeks toward his ears. The G-forces really weren't that strong, and I thought ride designers had done too little to dress up the simple track layout. But none of that mattered to the kid. His rating: 4.
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